My blog has been pretty quiet over the last few months. I’ve spent that time writing personal journal entries and random little notes here and there… so A Drop in the Bucket has been pretty neglected. I apologize. But… I’ve decided to write in a few of these personal entries of my life from March through May. Included is everything from journal pieces to noted observations to titles of attempted poetry. Have a read! You’ve been warned.
March 2013 – Road Trip
CRAZED OBSERVATION NOTE: We are in Iowa! And in Iowa there are crops! And where there are crops there are crop circles! And where there are crop circles there are UFO’s! And where there are UFO’s there are aliens and possessed people riding bicycles around strange miniature castles!
The setting: Two best friends, no sleep, nighttime, energy drinks, long road trip. Don’t ask me what I was thinking here. I doubt that I was…
April 2013 – Secrets
The only remembrance I have of April is that I was keeping a surprise from my best friend. I wrote one somewhat vague journal entry during this time.
JOURNAL: Ahh! Sometimes you don’t tell a certain someone about some extremely intricate plans. If that someone is a person you’ve told everything to in the past… this is a very hard and daunting task.
May 2013 – The Hard Goodbye Problems
I did several things in May. Mostly just by surprising a friend by doing a 1,400-mile-away visit, getting engaged, attempting poetry, saying goodbye to a friend… and writing a journal entry about the goodbye once the entire shebang was over.
JOURNAL: Goodbye. I’ve been saying it in a big way every year for the past ten years. Grandparents, pets, friends, churches. You name it. It started when my grandfather was killed by a sudden complication with an unknown cancer. Then my church burned down. Events kept following this pattern. Most recently it was telling my best friend that I’d see her soon. One wedding and two weeks later, I’m learning that goodbyes can be really hard when they are never said. Sure, I know why we didn’t say it. I guess we wanted to feel some sort of openness in our friendship, maybe something that would make us look forward to the future and not get too emotional in our “last” moments together. We love each other! We didn’t want the closure of a goodbye that hovered over a 8,000-mile, 15-hour difference between each other for an indefinite amount of future time. It felt potentially final. One “See you later!” and I flew to Minnesota as she prepared to fly to Guam. *sigh* This openness might kill me.
All of my rantings soon came to an end with two last attempts at poetry. Note: there is a reason you don’t get the actual poems…
POEM 1 TITLE: Tears and Gasoline
POEM 2 TITLE: Go For It
I’ve just realized that all of these entries revolve around one person. I know that person is reading this. Hey, Person, forgive me for the vague blog post that’s practically directed right at you. Anyway… maybe I can write some new stuff now that all of the old stuff is off my chest. Woohoo! Here’s to the future!